Bold Predictions for Each Team

So Fantasy Pros did the following article:

Without reading the article, I will make my own bold predictions:

Bills: James Cook will not be nearly as interesting in fantasy as everyone hopes. More like a barely there 3rd down back.
Jets: Zack Wilson will faceplant this season, and Mike White will be starting before the end of it.
Dolphins: They won’t be great, they won’t be terrible, just…meh. Expect nothing from their running game.
Patriots: DeVante Parker finally proves he can be an alpha WR.
Steelers: Trubisky takes the QB job and never looks back. Pickett becomes a career backup.
Ravens: Lamar Jackson is done. He can’t run without getting hurt, and his passing is mediocre.
Bengals: Welcome to the cellar. Their offensive line is their undoing, as they lose Burrow for another season.
Browns: Deshaun can’t save this team, even after his suspension.
Colts: No bold predictions here. They are just boring good.
Jaguars: We learn Trevor Lawrence ain’t what he was touted as coming out of college.
Titans: How many games before Derrick Henry is lost for the season? Starting the clock…now…
Texans: Davis Mills is a real NFL QB! Who knew?
Raiders: A new powerhouse is born. They knock the Chiefs off their AFC West perch.
Chiefs: Not a terrible team, but not the best, or second best, in their own division.
Chargers: Another AFC powerhouse, unfortunately stuck in a division of powerhouses. Ekeler is on the downside of his career.
Broncos: Russell Wilson is not the solution everyone thought he was going to be. Who will they draft next year?
Eagles: Expect big things from this team, and big things from Jalen Hurts. He will be your QB1 this season.
Cowboys: Moseying along, like a horse on a slow gallup…
Giants: Forget this team. Just awful.
Commanders: See the Giants above? Same here.
Packers: They become a run-oriented team, and do as good as last year. Jones and Dillon top 1000 rushing yards each.
Vikings: They become a pass-oriented team, and do ok. Kirk Cousins could be a surprise for his fantasy owners.
Bears: Same old Bears. Not going anywhere. Fields looks better, but it’s all for naught.
Lions: Not great, but surprisingly ok. Who is this Jared Goff fellow?
Saints: Will wow everyone, as Jaboo Wins takes the NFL by storm! Ok, maybe not by storm, but rather by brutal efficiency, with lots of td’s. By the way, they also have a tough defense!
Buccaneers: Brady can still play, but the rest of this bunch begins to look like a reunion of 70’s players trying to relive their glory days. Brady can only carry this bunch so far.
Panthers: Waiting for Matt Corral, because Mayfield and Darnold ain’t it.
Falcons: Could be surprisingly better, especially in the running game. Don’t ignore Tyler Allgeier.
Rams: The Super Bowl champions come down to Earth. Another year older isn’t another year better, although Allen Robinson is an upgrade over Woods/Beckham.
Cardinals: A hot mess waiting to collapse. Kyler Murray ain’t all that. The homework clause was there for a reason, and it wasn’t racism.
49ers: Shanahan’s coaching game of 3-card Monte is getting annoying. When will the players get annoyed? This year? Trey Lance will either buy Shanahan another year, or collapse this house of cards.
Seahawks: The ground and pound Seahawks? This might actually work for them. And Geno Smith might hold onto the QB job beyond this season.